Sunday 23 October 2011

The "Friendzone"

No offence, but I don’t want to be your wingman anymore. And by yours, I mean his, 007’s. I don’t even know if I ever want to be 007’s wingman. I can’t even blame him for the idea either because I was the one that suggested that I would help him pick up beautiful women that resemble HowlingFetus’ shit-for-brains girl. These are the types of girls that I couldn’t even hope to hold a tea-light candle to.. I’m not a very girly person. I don’t dress or act like a girl, and I don’t really convey many emotions to people I know (which is the best thing about ranting to strangers).

If you asked me a few weeks ago if I even considered being in a relationship with 007 I would have screwed up my face in the same manner in which I did when I saw my snake vomit up half a dead rat. Oh god, the smell from that was just…

But the past few weeks, with people asking me about how close 007 and I are getting, whether we’re in a relationship or not.. I seem to have taken him out of the elusive “friendzone” in my mind, and it’s always pretty difficult to put someone back in.. I’m sure some of you out there know what I’m talking about... And I’m so far within this guy’s friendzone that he is almost disgusted at the mere idea of us being an “us”. I think the best example of this was when he told me about a "deep and meaningful" he had when one of his friends asked him about what was going on.. He told me how real men have D&M's..
Friend: So, you and the Captain, eh?
007: Hell no.

Pretty damn funny, huh?

Don’t get me wrong though.. I’m not in love with the guy.. I don’t know if I want to be in a relationship.. I honestly don’t know what I want.. But shit, man. Is it really such a bad idea?

This is YourCaptainSpeaking, sending a big screw you to the friendzone.

2 comments:

  1. The "friendzone" is down there with the other stupid social constructs that do nothing except make it more difficult for people to be seen as unique individuals, as opposed to "the rock" or "the listener" etc. - and it sucks more, because being in the "friendzone" makes it harder for those in it to open up to eachother on a deep level - when you try, it makes you feel... Well, frustrated and misunderstood (as the author of this blog post probably knows)

    When the people in it are frustrated and misunderstood, the "friendzone" seems like a "daaannnggaa-zone" - nor a place you'd wanna stay for long (unless you're Stirling Archer, of course... :P)

    It sucks even more when you (deep down) want the same validation as you offer the other person in your "friendzone" (by acting as his "wingman" you are validating the idea that he is attractive, after all...) and most times, you can't ask for it without conveying a sense that you want more from him/her than friendship...

    Maybe declaring explicitly that you want some sort of validation from this guy might make it easier for him to be objective, without making him feel too vulnerable - who knows, knowing what he's thinking might help you get on with what may be a great friendship

    All I know is that the "friendzone" can be
    blinding - and I share your sentiments toward it!

    P.S. I haven't come across a blog so blunt and bold in a while... :)

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  2. It's nice to see some feedback on here, thank you for your comment :)

    Yes, the "friendzone" is a very frustrating place, and I'm definitely going to take your suggestion on talking to 007. A little clarity, I'm sure, will go a long way!

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